Our Disability Our Cross

Christ Jesus calls the disabled to a very important vocation. The Heavenly Father called His own Son to be obedient even to death on a Cross. Our obedience to God our Father is to become obedient to our disability. To embrace our disability unto death and this is our death on our Cross. We can only accomplish this with the gift of grace.

Grace is our energy our power received as gift from the Blessed Trinity. We become co-heirs with Christ Jesus in the healing of humanity by our very existence in the human family. Our yes welcomes us into this spiritual family. Our disability is our Cross. Is death itself our Crucifixion, the very separation of our soul with our broken body. Is the suffering that we endure in our broken body what brings healing to our broken world. I believe it is.

Have a blessed weekend!
Your brother in Christ Jesus,
Mark
Hermits of the Holy Cross

Journey Toward the Incarnate Christ

I keep looking for ways to try to heal and move forward living with my disability, Proteus Syndrome. But, It’€™s been difficult for me to accept this disability and embrace it, even after 57 years of living. This is my Cross€. I have always tried my hardest to overcome obstacles that seem to stand in my way, and to keep pushing forward, but Proteus Syndrome has a life of its own and It’€™s taking over. I don’€™t like that. It’€™s like I’m at war with it, but since it’s part of who I am, am I at war with myself? I hope this doesn’t sound too nutty. My mind and heart want to walk again but my body says. “No sir, you’re not going to do that”€. It’s challenging. I am always thinking of new ways to overcome these obstacles I face, but now the Proteus has got me homebound. This is really difficult to accept, because I loved being with people and being a brother to everyone. I was a Capuchin-Franciscan for 12 years. I took my Solemn Vows in 1996. I felt so guilty that this disability was beginning to be so expensive, since I had no health insurance due to Proteus Syndrome being a “pre-existing condition”. No health insurance company would take me under their wing. This was my reality in 2000. The burden it placed on my Order became another source of guilt to me back then. In my heart, however, I am still a Capuchin-Franciscan. I pray every day that Christ Jesus will have mercy on the many bad decisions I made back then. I still have a deep desire to help save souls for Christ, so I began the Hermits of the Holy Cross from home. It’s a ministry in the Church for the physically disabled who still want to serve in some way but are physically unable to do so. In this ministry, the Hermits of the Holy Cross, we serve spiritually, offering up to God our sufferings that stem from our disabilities. We offer intercessory prayer for our world, our parishes, our families and friends. There are now five Hermits of the Holy Cross. Theresa, Stephanie, Marie, Audrey and myself. We are all living in different parts of the world, in Canada, New York, Texas and California. Our spirits are working together for Christ Jesus, in real time, helping Him heal our broken world. We try to be an inspiration to others. Suffering has meaning. No one suffers in vain. God created us the way we are for His purpose. We are His children. Despite our physical limitations, our suffering offered up or our prayers that ascend to Heaven for others and for ourselves, assist our Christ. So, in closing, I just wanted to reach out to you, my disabled sisters and brothers around the world, to hopefully lift your hearts up with encouragement and hope during this Advent and Christmas Season. We want you to know we are with you in spirit, in the struggles that life brings. Keep climbing the mountain, keep holding on to that cross you carry. Soon it will be traded for a crown. Have a most blessed Christmas from all of us in the Hermits of the Holy Cross.

Your brother in Christ Jesus,

Mark

Hermits of the Holy Cross

Suffering, An Ingredient in God’s Grace

“It is now the hour for you to wake from sleep, for our salvation is closer than when we first accepted the faith. The night is far spent, the day draws near, so let us cast of deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.” Romans 13: 11-12

As the Church, a Community of Believers, we have now entered into the Advent Season in our Calendar. The Second Person of the Holy Trinity made a sacrifice by coming to us as a member of the human family

“that we may share in the divinity of Christ, who humbled himself to share in our humanity”

God emptied Himself for all of us that we could share His holiness. God did not have to humble Himself in this way. He could have stayed in His Heaven ordering us all to do this or do that, condemning us for the smallest infraction. Christ, in the depth of His love choose sacrifice, compassion and eternal love for us His children. For those who have raised children, I’m sure you in your compassion and love, you can remember the many times you sacrificed for them. Most parents have desired more for their children than for themselves.

As Hermits of the Holy Cross, our sacrifice to God is our own sufferings that we endure each day because of our physical disabilities. These sufferings can be emotional, psychological, and physical. Society teaches us that our sufferings have no meaning at all and that we should do everything we can to eradicate it. Sufferings are just a nuisance. But we all know through experience we cannot completely eradicate our suffering in our daily lives. Therefore, they cannot be completely removed. But, that’s not to say, that we shouldn’t try to alleviate them. We do try because we want to experience peace in heart and mind. Christ taught us through His own sufferings that they have meaning.

Personally, here’s what I believe, I believe our sufferings, when offered to God through our free will, assist God in the creation of grace. Sounds odd I know. Christ Jesus tells us that we make up what is lacking in the sufferings of Christ. “Now I rejoice in what I am suffering for you, and I fill up in my flesh what is still lacking in regard to Christ’s afflictions, for the sake of his body, which is the Church.” Col 1:24

Through the suffering, and death of Christ upon the Cross he taught us suffering has purpose. God does not waste it, but uses it. Think of grace as spiritual fuel for our daily lives. Plants and trees need rain, our bodies need food, cars need gasoline, many products need electricity. Our spirit too, needs grace to grow closer to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. This Advent and Christmas Season ask God

“to fill you with the knowledge of His will with all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives.” Col: 1:9 Have you ever seen the painting of Christ Jesus knocking upon the door to be welcomed in but there is no door knob on His side of the door. This reminds us that Christ doesn’t barge in but patiently waits for us to open the door to allow Him in. The spiritual life is a give and take between two lovers. Try giving God your sufferings this, the Season of Incarnation, and ask Him to help you to understand why suffering is in our lives. Grace will be there for you. Through our suffering offered to God we participate in the creation of Gods gift, transforming grace.

Have a wonderful Advent and Christmas Season.

You are in our prayers each day. If you would like us to pray for any special intention please email bro.Mark at dextraze13@yahoo.com Its free.

Your brother in Christ Jesus,

Mark

Hermits of the Holy Cross

Hermits of the Holy Cross

I often ponder as I look out my window from this bed I am confined to. I’m not sure if I’ll walk again. I hope to. This ankle ulcer keeps rearing it’s ugly head when I put any amount of weight on my foot. In my head, I’m filled with hope, but that hope gets shattered each time I attempt to walk any little bit. I feel I still have so much to do with my life. What that is I do not know. It will show itself through time. From my experience, the heart/mind soul/spirit desires one thing while the physical body seems to want something completely different. Aging seems to be unforgiving and relentless. I have learned to believe our physical body is in conflict with our spirit/soul because our spirit is infinite while our body is finite. In my mind, I still feel young, but I attempt to put my body into action but it won’t move from this bed. It’s going to take an act of God to get these legs in shape again. My body/spirit interaction strives for reconciliation, and without the help of God’s grace this reconciliation will not take place no matter how hard I try on my own.

“O God, you are my God, for you I long;

for you my soul is thirsting.

My body pines for you

like a dry, weary land without water”. Psalm 63

Why is it some of us seem to be chosen to be disabled, deformed, homebound, or bedridden? One hundred years ago, here in America, not all but many parents placed their disabled child in a “home” or placed them in the cellar or attic of their own home. This is what Martin Luther wrote about a physically disabled child,

“If I were the Prince, I should take this child to the Moldau River which flows near Dessau and drown him.’ The advice was refused. Luther then suggested: ‘Well then, the Christians shall order the Lord’s prayer to be said in church and pray that the dear Lord take the Devil away.’ This was done daily and the ‘changeling’ died in the following year.” Cited in Ted Harrison, Disability Rights and Wrongs (Lion Publishing, Oxford, 1995), p.57.

Some clergy still believe this about the disabled. It’s terrible to experience. However,

this treatment does not negate the fact that in God’s eyes, we’ve still been chosen by Him to be the heart of His Church. Thank God, here in America, society has made positive strides toward the disabled, especially with the passing of the Disability Act in 1995. However, this mission I write about comes from the spiritual side of our humanity. We Hermits of the Holy Cross believe we have been called by God to pray and offer our sufferings to God for all our sisters and our brothers around our world. We are all members of one human family. We all struggle in some way, yet we still believe God draws us to minister in this way through prayer and suffering. St. Paul tells us in his letter to the Colossians:

“I rejoice in my sufferings for you, and fill up in my flesh what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ, for the sake of His body, the Church.” Colossians 1:24

and

“I want all those who find themselves deep in suffering, that God has called us to be spiritual leaders in the work of salvation, as we become ourselves, perfect through suffering.” Hebrews

I believe there is a reason God uses suffering to bring us to perfection. Suffering is the anthesis of Heavenly wholeness and perfection. Because of our human nature we all hate suffering. Most of us, especially myself, will do everything possible to avoid it and we should do our best to relieve suffering. At the beginning, in Genesis, we were never meant to suffer. We can’t forget this truth. But we also must accept the fact that humanity did fall out of grace with God by attempting to be gods on our own terms. With this pride the human family became broken. Many don’t want to accept this truth and have been running from the suffering since. We must not lose hope however, for God has indeed brought us back into relationship with Himself through the sufferings of Christ Jesus upon the Cross. He has brought the grace of healing and wholeness to each of our eternal souls. Through His Son, He has opened the gate to eternal life.

For we are now

“strangers and aliens no longer. No, you are fellow citizens of the Saints and members of the household of God.” “in Him you are being built into this temple, to become a dwelling place for God in the Spirit.” Ephesians: 2

So, my sisters and brothers who are disabled, or homebound, or just struggling with suffering in some way, let us pray for the gift of hope for

‘The sufferings of this present age are as nothing compared with the glory to be revealed in us.” Romans 8:18

Yours and my suffering does indeed have meaning. You may be struggling with trying to accept this truth, but we have been called to have faith in Christ Jesus. Rest assured though, for even Christ’s closest Apostles struggled with their faith in Christ. We need only to look at Peter and Thomas to see the struggle. St. Padre Pío used to say often, “Pray, Hope and Don’t Worry” This has helped me through many a darkened hour.

What God calls each of us to do is to open our hearts, even just a little bit, to let the Holy Spirit come into our hearts and into our lives. We pray God will bring us healing and wholeness, if not in a physical way, we seek healing in our heart and soul too, that we may embrace the suffering that God has called us to endure for His glory. That we may offer our sufferings as a gift to God for the healing and wholeness of our world.

If you are physically disabled, follow the path of our Lord Jesus Christ and believe God is calling you to this ministry of prayer and the offering of your sufferings as a Hermit of the Holy Cross feel free to email me at dextraze13@yahoo.com

May our loving and merciful God fill your heart with grace and have a most blessed week. Peace and Goodness,

Your brother in Christ Jesus,

Mark

Hermits of the Holy Cross

Please pray for us.

Loneliness Dissipates

Many in our society today are slowly dying, not from something that’s physically discernible yet it has the energy to cause physical scars. loneliness. We are social beings. We are intended to be social. The majority of us have grown up in a family dynamic. Our first steps are usually taken when we’re with others, like our parents. This was the place we learnt about life and how to treat one another and ourselves. We learned to speak our first words in front of our parents or family. Family was the dynamic we learned to trust, not only ourselves but how to trust others. “Remember that ol’ phrase, “It takes a village to raise a child. It’s so true. Many in other Countries still abide by this saying. But here in the West we’ve left it to the “Nuclear Family”. Some grew up in families that believed we were to move out at 18 and begin a new life with our spouse or ourselves. Family is often experienced only at Thanksgiving and Christmas or on other special occasions. During those times we often just put up with each other until everyone went home. We’d breathe a sigh of relieve.

I had the privilege of growing up with a best friend who was from a Hispanic family. I’d often want to stay with them because their family was like the village I spoke of earlier. There was never a dull moment there. They would share and yell, discuss and accept. Reasons or times to be lonely were often not experienced in this dynamic and I loved it. Don’t get me wrong, for I grew up in a very loving and accepting family. My ma and pop were very good to me, but my brother was four years older than me. I have a dear sister that is one year older than me. We are still very close. But there was something to that village dynamic that always spoke to me. They had no concept of what a nuclear family was. There was never a chance to really experience a feeling of inner loneliness because when one felt down the others surrounded them and just shared their ups and downs with each other. They weren’t afraid to express their inner thoughts or their feelings. They knew how to communicate, but if they didn’t they often just tried no matter what the outcome would be. They weren’t afraid to get sloppy with each other because they learned life was often times messy. I believe what’s missing in society today is this type of communication. Often, when I could get out I’d see people communicate on their phones or through social media, but that face to face type of communication was often missing. Being together gives off an energy that we miss when we’re on our phone. This energy comes mostly from the feelings we are experiencing and sharing, while looking at each other, experiencing one another in the present moment. It’s almost impossible to read one another’s body language when we’re not in close physical proximity to one another. This absence of physical contact is what can cause an inner loneliness. If we’re not use to being alone it can become quite frightful. If we believe in a Higher Power, God, we have no one to talk with, to share our inner struggles or even our hopes and dreams. Loneliness can creep in rather quickly when alone. The longing for human contact grows when alone. Feelings get buried within the broken areas of our life. Loneliness can turn into resentment and resentment into hatred. Often times it takes but a smile or a hello when passing each other to change someone’s day. I think we’re often afraid these days to reach out to one another. We’ve built up a fear we might be seen as encroaching into someone’s privacy. We don’t look up in the subway for fear of locking with someone we don’t know. Often we grew up believing that we’re to be rugged individuals. We were taught we were to take care of ourselves. I can climb this mountain by myself and everyone will be so proud of me. But God didn’t seem to desire to want to create us to be alone. God seemed to have created us to be family, to be as village. When we haven’t experienced this we often times can grow-up being fearful of others. This is a tragedy. We grow through exchanges of ideas, when we have the willingness to express feelings when with one another in a safe environment. Feelings, when they bubble up inside of us, don’t seem so daunting to us. When we have others to share our daily lives with love blossoms and a new village is born. We grow within when we grow together as family and village. It may be a village of friends or a village of the like minded. In our brokenness we all desire to be accepted. Loneliness often times dissipates, love can blossom when in a trusting environment where we have the ability to look out for one another. If you know someone who is alone reach out to them. Often a few words of kindness or a wave and hello can go a long way to make one feel they belong to the larger family or village.

Have a most blessed week.

Peace and Goodness,

your brother,

Mark

Wholeness Is Holiness

“So they watched him closely to see if he would heal him on the Sabbath. Jesus said to the man with the shriveled hand, “Stand up in front of everyone.”Then Jesus asked them, “Which is lawful on the Sabbath: to do good or to do evil, to save life or to kill?” But they remained silent. He looked around at them in anger and, deeply distressed at their stubborn hearts, said to the man, “Stretch out your hand.” He stretched it out, and his hand was completely restored. Then the Pharisees went out and began to plot with the Herodians how they might kill Jesus.” (Mark Ch.3)

Picture this scene. This man who probably sits in the back of the synagogue because he’s been tormented so many times by others and is now afraid to sit anywhere else. This man who undoubtably has been ridiculed and laughed at so many times, has now been asked by Jesus to walk to the front of the synagogue and must face all those who may have persecuted him. Jesus shines light on his vulnerability and helps him to face his fears, to have hope that Jesus the Christ can help him.

Imagine the embarrassment and fear he’s facing and feelings he walks to the front. He has no idea what Jesus will say or do, so Jesus comforts and reassures the disabled man by calling out exactly what He plans to do. Heal the man’s shriveled hand. Many may not know the history of this man’s life. What he has had to endure because of his disability. Perhaps he was born with the afflicted hand. Maybe he endured a horrible accident. The man was brave, though, to step forward in front of the entire assembly. He trusted Christ Jesus with his heart, with his body. He had a very strong faith in Christ. His hope too, was very strong. The man was asked to expose his “brokenness” in order to receive the Mercy and Healing that Christ Jesus wanted for him. Jesus also had to face the bunch that were attempting to keep this man ostracized. There was no empathy or compassion in their hearts for others. They have become to wrapped up with the Law.

They lost sight in the fact that “the Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath”, meaning God’s love is to help us become His children and accept the grace that He presents us as gift. The Sabbath is not for those in charge to condemn us or keep us from experiencing all of God’s gifts. They became jury and judge instead of being examples of mercy, compassion and forgiveness. Examples of God’s peace.

The man with the withered hand was called by Christ to confront his personal fears and when he did he found healing in the arms of Jesus. We who are disabled must often confront our fears. Perhaps those fears are from those who make fun of us or ridicule us. Maybe it’s due to those who attempt to keep us down by not allowing us to share our gifts with others. Christ Jesus knows our struggles with daily life. Remember they laughed at Christ as well. They turned away from Him when they didn’t understand His teachings on love, mercy and forgiveness or being kind to the lowly, the outcast, and the alien. He remained strong, understanding that there will always be people that want to keep us who have so much to offer the world hidden from society. See yourself in the man with the withered hand. See yourself confronting your fears. See yourself in the arms of pure Love. The Holy Trinity will live in your heart. The gifts within your heart will find expression. Those that come into your life will be touched and renewed in the love, compassion and mercy that you share. And the light of Divinity will radiate through you. Let’s pray for each other as we make our way through life. Hopefully one day we will meet one another and if not in this life God willing in the life to come. Please pray for the Hermits of the Holy Cross.

Love and Goodness,
Your brother always,
Mark
Hermits of the Holy Cross

God of Gladness and Tranquility by b.Mark

“To rest in the Lord and to see his joy is like a banquet, and full of gladness and tranquility.” St. Ambrose

The Hermits of the Holy Cross would like to express thanks to Richard, Roberta and Caryn Therese for their outpouring kindness joining our Hermits Staff. The Hermits of the Holy Cross is a Lay Christian Contemplative Association whose Spiritual Path is one of Enlightened Suffering for the physically disabled, some being homebound due to physical limitation. Even though the Hermits are physically disabled we are not limited in spirit. We continue to have a deep desire to love God and to serve our respective Churches through the offering of our suffering to God for all people and for our beautiful Earth. We have a deep desire for prayer, not only our own contemplative prayer of union with God, but most especially intercessory prayer for others who are seeking union with God in the Holy Spirit. We all need spiritual help in our daily lives. Personally, I need it every day. So, we created the Hermits Staff, that others can help pray for us as we Hermits struggle day to day attempting to make sense of it all. I still scratch my head when I try to understand what the meaning of suffering is. I’ve come to the conclusion that suffering is like gold or diamonds to God. When we offer our suffering, God transforms it into grace. Grace is like gasoline for our tanks, so that we can move closer to that Holy Mountain we climb each day. Grace transforms our lives. Grace is what keeps us going forward on this spiritual journey. If we don’t feel as if we’re getting enough grace (gasoline) to keep moving forward we have the holy Sacrament of Reconciliation to assist us. Even if we feel our sins aren’t bad enough for this Sacrament, we can still receive grace from this wonderful gift that has been given to all people from our loving and merciful God. Many believe if they are not Catholic they can’t receive God’s gift of forgiveness. I personally believe God who is the Creator of all His children does not limit His capabilities. All are called by God to be His children, for that is what we truly are. God created us to love and to serve not only Him but each other and ourselves. Each of us are wonderfully created. We are shinning stars in Gods eyes. And we are called to shine our brightest. And since this is the Lenten Season it’s the perfect time to give your life to Christ Jesus as sisters and as brothers of Him. Much like the Prodigal Son, we too will be embraced by our loving Father, if only we take the steps toward Reconciliation and Union. So, as we Hermits are praying for you and offering our daily suffering for you, our dear team of Hermits Staff are praying for us and we are eternally grateful to each of them. If you feel called by the Holy Spirit to join our Hermits Staff to assist us through your powerful prayers please let us know. We would be grateful to have you assisting us with our own ministry for our world. If you are physically disabled and feel God is calling you to become a Hermit of the Holy Cross please let us know. We welcome all Christian Faith Traditions with Love at its foundation. If you become a Hermit of the Holy Cross, you stay right where you are, in your own home, you assist us through your prayer and by offering your personal struggles to God for the “life of the world” just as Christ Jesus has taught us. “As the Bride of Christ, His Body, our sufferings are so united with Christ’s that we can offer them in union with His redemptive work for the salvation of souls” (Colossians 1:24). “Look at what is before your eyes. If any one is confident that he is Christs, let him remind himself that as he is Christs, so are we.” (2 Cor. 7) Even though we may be physically disabled, we are all God’s children. There is no shame in disability. And even though we may have physical limitations we have great spiritual gifts to offer and through these offerings and through prayer we assist Christ Jesus heal the world and all within it. Never forget we are all shinning lights of God who loves us beyond anything we can ask or imagine. And to our Hermits Staff, Richard, Roberta and Caryn Therese, as Bro. Joe, a great Capuchin-Franciscan once told me, “your reward in Heaven will be great.” Hold these words close to your heart for you are a treasure to us and to our world.
Peace to each of you. We thank God for the Hermits and the Hermits Staff.

contact info is @ dextraze13@yahoo.com

Pax et Bonum,
Your brother in Christ Jesus,
Mark

Reunited by b.Mark

If we want to resemble Christ Jesus we should follow his example found in the Gospels and in the letters in the New Testament. We are called to imitate the love of Christ. He welcomed the stranger, the alien. He plays no favorites. The poor, the forgotten by society, the rejected by society, Christ Jesus embraces. He never condemned anyone, but He always remained firm with those who turned away from doing the right thing. The Pharisees, the Sadducees, and the Scribes who refused to show mercy. They became judge and jury instead of forgiving, having mercy, and loving each child of God. When those who strayed from the path of love, Christ Jesus compared us to lambs that got lost. He gently placed the lamb on top of His shoulders and He brought them back to the fold. I am not sure why people reject Christ Jesus today as they did 2000 years ago. He showed nothing but kindness toward others, mercy, compassion, forgiveness, and love toward others. He pointed us in the direction of hope. He conquered death and showed us that our soul is eternal. Every society, to remain healthy, have laws to keep us on the path of peace and happiness but God has always given His children chance after chance to get it right and opportunity after opportunity to love Him back. This is the meaning of the Lenten Season. God, the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit opens His arms for us to come home. Like the story of the Prodigal Son, we too have the opportunity to come home into the arms of love. Remember that song by Peaches and Herb called Reunited? I was reminded of this song this Lenten Season. That this is an opportune time to be reunited with our loving God. I honestly don’t believe God condemns anyone. We condemn ourselves. God does not want any of His children to be separated from Him. Why would He since He created us. He created the Earth to share His beauty with us and to guide us to Himself.
Some people ask, if there really is a God, why would there be so much suffering and brokenness in the world. Yet, even Christ Jesus suffered at the hands of men who misunderstood who He even was. They were looking for a political hero, or even a military hero that was going to destroy the Roman occupation and end their brutality toward the Jews. But Jesus came preaching, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they are doing” “My Kingdom is not of this world” for those who are weary and overburdened Christ calls us and promises peace and comfort. If only we open our lives to him and our hearts to him. He’s not here to condemn us, like the Pharisees and Sadducees want you to believe. He is not here to condemn but to heal and love. Baptism renews us into a life of grace. Grace is the fuel that protects and heals. When we receive these gifts we become examples of Christ in our daily lives. It is not just for the future but for the here and now. We are promised eternity in Heaven to begin on Earth through unity. Christ Jesus died for all people, not just for some. Meditate upon the Gospels. When Christ found the lost sheep He did not chastise the sheep, hurt the sheep, make the sheep feel terrible nor condemn the sheep. Therefore, we should not chastise each other. We should not look on others as if they are lost or beyond hope just as Christ does not treat us like that. So let us imitate Christ this Lenten Season. “Love one another as Christ has loved you.”

Love and Prayer,
Your brother in Christ,
Mark
Hermits of the Holy Cross