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_THOUGHTS AND A DREAM:_
Like some, I too have looked for peace every where other but on the inside of my own being. But its on the inside that true peace can only be found. But why? Why is it peace cannot be found outside ourselves? And why do so many in our world pursue peace on the outside while never learning that peace can only be found within? We strive for the things we only think will make us happy because this is what we have been taught. This is what society teaches us through media.
God first experienced the Dark Night of the Soul when we first abandoned Him in the Garden of Eden. Although we were taught that it was a matter of disobedience we lost the friendship of God, I believe it was much more of the fact that we had turned our back on God. The fact that we believed what was best for us was to make the decision that we knew what was best for us. It was a matter of trust, trusting that God had the right answers for our life. The question remains however, why did God allow this ” Tree of Life and Death” to grow smack dab center in His beautiful garden? What really is a “Tree of Life and Death?” We must remember too, that God created nothing that was evil. This is the tree of good and evil and if you take its fruit and eat it you will “be like gods” is what the serpent said. Its the fact that we thought we could be so bold as to place ourselves par to our Creator. We thought we could unlock the secrets of good and evil.
Forgiveness, healing, and love are now powers living hidden in the Holy Eucharist. These powers can be released when we allow Christ Jesus in the Holy Eucharist to dwell within us. For it is Christ who’s power it is that flows from our very being. In life we dream about becoming someone, helping others and making a difference in this world we live in, but often these dreams die. We one day look back and realize that we lost the dream to make that difference. The question we are faced with in our twilight years is, what do I do with my losses, my dreams that did not become realities? Am I going to bury them in my heart afraid of exposing them and looking like a failure to my family, my friends my brothers and sisters in my parish and in my family? Will I be a disappointment to others? I feel I am a disappointment to myself. Will God be disappointed in me? What did I do with the penny, the nickle, the dime that God gave me? I tried to invest it but I lost it. What is going to happen to me now.? Am I going to be seen as a failure to my Lord?
May 2nd, 2013
Early this morning since I awoke at 2:30am for prayers I had this extremely visual dream who I believe was my Guardian Angel visiting me. Here’s my dream and if anyone believes they can translate it for me please do so. Only if you feel God is calling you to do so, okay. Here we go: I was entering into a RV. And I could walk (I can’t walk) even though I still had my disability I wasn’t bothered with pain. This beautiful young lady approached me and slid her hands down my arms and reached up to kiss me on my mouth. She was very fair, had long red hair down to her waist. What stood out about her was her spirit. She radiated purity and kindness. I loved to be with her for she accepted me completely, she loved me for me. She took me then to a large building, but before that I met this young man who was inviting a coach to go see his MMA fight. For some reason the coach was not allowed to go to the MMA match. I spoke to the young man and said I would go to the MMA fight. I wondered why the coach could not go as well. I then found myself in the building with my Guardian Angel. We were way up high and there were very large windows we were looking out of. These little baby owls, 3 of them began their first flights. They flew a little bit but could not stay in flight and soon found themselves flying into a bunch of little puppies out playing on this ranch. The baby owls flew right into them. Chaos insued. The puppies were either playing with the baby owls or tearing them up. They stirred up a great deal of dust so it was truly difficult to see what was really happening. Deep down I think the baby owls were gettin eaten. All in the building who were watching this out this large windows were shocked and scared. I then found myself now alone on top of another building on the roof. There was a large pine tree growing next to the building. Again, there were baby birds but this time in their nests. A large Crow flew to one of the nests and grabbed one of the babies and ate it. I could not stop this Crow even though I wanted to. The Crow once again flew to another nest and took another baby. This time the baby bird was a little larger. The Crow had to land on the ground to devour it. When the Crow had done this a lady ran up to it and started to hit it with her purse and yelling, bad Crow. The Crow looked at her, and was thinking why are you hitting me I am doing what I am meant to do? Then I woke up. Even though it was so negative and graphic what I remembered the most was my Guardian Angel being with me. Now I can understand you might think this young lady was just that a young lady. But my spirit just knew this was my Guardian Angel. It was instinctive. I am not sure what all this means but what stands out to me is the baby owls because I have always loved owls. Is my Guardian Angel getting me prepared for some hard times coming my way?